In Six Months…In One Day

So far this week, most of my thoughts and energy have been focused on the IVF. With acupuncture appointments Monday and Wednesday, an RE appointment Tuesday, and making sure I remembered to take the pill (started on Sunday), and twice daily antibiotics (starting on Monday), it’s no wonder I had IVF (and pregnancy) on the brain!

Our appointment on Tuesday went well overall. I had my sonohysterogram (SHG), an ultrasound where saline is injected into the uterus to check for any structural abnormalities, and an endometrial biopsy (this was the reason for taking antibiotics for 5 days, to stave off any potential infection). My uterus passed with flying colours, and we were told that the biopsy results would take a week and we would only be contacted if there was an issue.

After the procedures were over, we met with one of the nurses to go over our protocol, learn about the different medications, and discuss what would happen at each stage of the process.

The first thing that happened is we found out that my protocol was updated from what I’d received on Friday when I got my period. Apparently during the ultrasound I’d just had, my ovaries looked “more prominent” than the Dr. was expecting, so I would be starting off on a lower dose of stimulation drugs (I think this can only be a good thing).

The other change was that most of my timing got pushed back a week, so retrieval and transfer were now projected to happen first week of May, instead of last week of April, as the nurse who sent me the protocol on Friday had made an error in updating all of the start times. So, suppression (and injections!) would only start next Tuesday.

As I’d mentioned in a previous post (and here too!), trying to make a baby is not the only life changing event we’re going through right now. Basically, every aspect of our life is going through an upheaval due to our pending move this summer. To summarize briefly, in six months, I will be:

1. Living in a different city

2. Working at a new (as yet undetermined) job

3. Living in a new (as yet undetermined) house

4. (Crossing my fingers about this one!) pregnant

Yesterday morning the focus shifted from IVF and pregnancy to housing, or specifically the final steps to listing our house for sale. Our tenants are moving out, and we’ll be getting new carpet into the suite early next week, and listing the house a few days after that.

In the meantime, we had someone who would be a potential private purchaser through the house that morning (he owns the triplex next door to us, and we thought he might be interested in our house as an investment). My husband showed him the house, and he had some initial interest! We couldn’t show him the suite though, as it was too early for our tenants, and he wanted some more information about our costs, so he’ll be coming back early next week for another run through.

In any case, once that was over, all of our attention shifted to the house, and what we would be comfortable selling for privately vs. what we could get if we listed it. It’s such a gamble either way, because you don’t want to sell for too little, but also don’t want to list and then have it sit for too long and have to drop the price later anyways. The market where we are seems okay, but not hot right now. So, of course we’re hoping that if we list at what we think is a fair price, we’ll get interest from several different people and could sell for a bit over list price, but you never know.

Then in the afternoon, attention shifted from the house here, to my husband’s job. As I’ve explained, the driving force for this upcoming move is that my husband was offered a great position in another city. However, even though he’s known for about six weeks now that he has this job (and everyone there knows he’s coming), and we’re proceeding along like it’s a sure deal, even this job is not 100% in the bag yet as he does not yet have the written offer.

I realize that for most people this sounds like a huge red flag, and like we should not be making any plans until he has a signed written offer, but I should explain that he is an academic, and academia plays by its own rules. So even though the Chair of the department who he’ll be working for has worked out all the details of the offer with him, and drafted up the terms, the hire still had to be approved by the Dean, and then finally the Provost of the university.

 The Dean’s approval has now gone through, however we still needed approval from the Provost before we could have the offer in our hands. Originally, the delay with the Provost was because the department had offers out for two positions, and the Provost wanted to approve both offers at the same time. The person who was offered the second position was on the fence and had until the middle of March to decide. Mid March came and went, and he turned down the offer. So, we heard that everything should be approved by the end of last week. Early this week, my husband even got a reassuring email from the Chair that the offer was almost ready.

I felt pretty sure the offer would come yesterday, but instead my husband got an update from the Chair that in order to approve the hire, the Provost wants to see the CV of the best female candidate! My husband is in a male dominated faculty, so I know that a strong female candidate will always get the job over a strong male candidate, and that the university will do what it can to hire females wherever possible. The Chair (who is female, I may add, as is the Dean) did not seem too worried about this and felt that it was a mere formality. However, my husband started freaking out, especially when he saw that the Provost was also female!

So, we’re hoping that at this point it’s just a matter of having the CV on file, and everything can proceed as planned, but there’s always that small chance that the Provost will insist that the female candidate be brought in for an interview before everything is finalized. I figure that if they had any sort of half decent female apply, she would have already been one of the three people interviewed (I know for a fact all three were men), but who knows? So, limbo on the one thing that should be definite at this point continues.

Then, I got home from work to a message from my RE’s office to call them back, and just like that, my thoughts swung back to the IVF cycle! It was too late to call them back, so I had to leave a message and spend the rest of the evening wondering what they could be possibly calling about. Here were the only things I could think of:

1. Change in the protocol/timing – seems unlikely as we had nailed everything down just on Tuesday

2. Update that they got my results of the varicella titre (chicken pox immunity testing) – seems unlikely as I’d already told the nurse I knew that I wasn’t immune and was not going to have the vaccine before doing IVF

3. (The one that really scared me!) Abnormal results of the endometrial biopsy  meaning that we’d have to postpone or cancel our cycle – seems unlikely because it’s only been two days instead of a week, but at the same time I couldn’t help keep coming back to this as it also seemed more likely than the other two options. It doesn’t help that we have unexplained infertility and have passed any other tests with flying colours – maybe this is the smoking gun as to why we can’t conceive?

I started the day imagining our completely changed life in six months. And then, in one day, every single one of those assumptions got questioned.