Infertility is a waiting game. You’re always waiting for something…waiting for your period…waiting for ovulation…waiting for test results…waiting for the next Dr.’s appointment. And of course, the biggest wait of all – waiting for that baby to arrive in your arms safe and sound. However, while you wait, the rest of the world does not wait with you. Time passes, and the months and years start to tick by. This means that you are left with many milestones and anniversaries that inevitably will roll around again, and sometimes throw you for a loop when you least expect it.
As I was ringing in the new year, and looking ahead to what 2011 would bring, it dawned on me that almost every month in the first half of 2011 would bring with it some sort of anniversary or milestone to “celebrate”. So here we go:
January 2011 – Due date for my first pregnancy.
February 2011 – One year anniversary of when we bit the bullet and started fertility treatments.
March 2011 – Double whammy:
1. 35th birthday..that magical age when a woman’s fertility is supposed to “fall off a cliff” as I’ve heard it so eloquently described. Not sure what that means for me as mine seems to already be flailing about down below? To add insult to injury, I will be expecting my period right around my birthday, and its arrival will signal that it’s go time for my first IVF.
2. Two years since my husband and I had our initial fertility diagnostic tests done (sperm analysis for him and day 3 bloodwork for me).
April 2011 – One year since I conceived for the first time.
May 2011 – I think this one’s a freebie. Though if it does come down to doing the IVF, I will be finding out in early May if it’s succesful or not. So either way, May will become a milestone month.
June 2011 – Triple whammy:
1. Three years since we first pulled the goalie and started the baby making game.
2. One year since my miscarriage.
3. When the due date would have been for my chemical pregnancy.
While some of these are inevitable, I am hoping that some will not come to pass due to some good news over the next few months. However, right now I’m fully expecting to be raising a glass each month in a toast to what once was, and what could have been.